A long awaited entry....
Mood:  crushed out
So i know it's been a while since i've been on here. but as you know, i'm sans el computero. which really sucks. but i'll survive.

life is just peachy now. i'm very very content with most everything that is going on. my love life is so exciting now, and other areas of my life are going well too.

i am loved. i have friends, i have a great job, and a great sex life. YAY!!! i do miss my friends who i am not near. but i know they still love me, and i think i'm finally getting this long distant friendship thing down to a science. it's all good. :) yay! i'm happy, and hyper.

i had to go to court today cuz i got a ticket a few weeks back for not having a front license plate. which i didn't even think you needed a front one as long as you had a back. at least that's what everyone has always told me. but they were all liars.. they were wrong! i got the ticket to prove it. but everything went well. i had to go to town court in schoharie. which is only about half an hour south west of where i live. it was a quiet little town with one red light. people were friendly there. i had a slice of pizza at a small pizzaria on main street, then off to the court which is really a back room off of the town clerks office. there was a trial going on when i got there for traffic court. so the traffic court judge, dressed in his kahki's and a blue button down shirt, (no tie) held traffic court at the town clerks desk in the front of the office. it was an odd experience. my prior experiences with judges had them dressed in robes with armed bailifs by their sides, but not this one. i greeted the judge with a friendly handshake, and introduced myself. i pulled his copy of my ticket out of his back pocket and addressed me as "miss debby" he read to me the statement on the back of the ticket which explains should i plead guilty it would be the same as if i was found guilty by trial. then he asked me how i wanted to plea. i told him that i wasn't sure that i wanted to plea anything. and explained that the officer who gave me the ticket said if i got new plates on my van, he would most likely drop the ticket. so i showed him my new registration with my new plate number on it, and he smiles, signed the bottom of the ticket and dated it, and told me it was dismissed and to have a nice day. how pleasant. if only all court appearance could go this smoothly. so once again, i have gotten out of yet another ticket. :) schoharie town court is a very pleasant court to have to go to. not that i'm saying i'd want to ever have to go back, but if i had a choice, i would pick that one over the other's that i have been to.

on the way out of schoharie, i passed a covered bridge, which i thought only existed in vermont. it reminded me of my childhood and taking a daytrip with my family to see the covered bridges and maplemills in vermont. what a lovely day. and half a day of work to boot!! Yay! i'm so happy and content now. just sitting here with a smile on my face for no particular reason, just because i'm happy. :)

well, that about sums it up. i'm sure there's a ton of things that i've left out. it's been some time since i've been on here, but my important people know all the filler stuff that's been happening. :)

i miss you all!!

love always.

--Debby

The Ring
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Show me the meaning of being lonely.
Okay, so on this eve of valentine's day, i am slightly irritated. And this is my story why.

So i picked up my girlfriend, and my mother's dog to return the dog. (My girlfriend and i had a joint effort of dog sitting for the weekend.) and we drove out to my mom's boyfriend's place. dropped the dog off, chatted a bit. and then my mom showed it to me. she showed me the ring.

the ring. a 2.5 total karat diamond engagement ring. yes boys and girls, my momma is engaged. forget about the fact that she's still married to her most recent husband, steven, she's engaged to george. she's only known him for a month. mind you in that month, she's probably only been apart from him for no more than 4 hours at a time. so they're engaged. okay...

i really don't like him that much. there's just something about him that i detest the most. it's not gonna be good for the realtionship i have with my mom if i so much dislike her new fiance. but i can't get past this. i'm not going to really go into it now why i dislike him so much, maybe some other day. but i don't like him. i know my mom could do so much better.

so i was driving home with stephanie, and we were discussing my mom's engagement. which i'm irritated about. but it's not my engagement so i guess it doesn't matter what i think. so i was saying to steph that my mom and george have only known each other for the same amount of time that steph and i have known each other (about a month) and i think that they are just going too fast. steph rationalized and said "well they're older, and both not in good health, so maybe they have a sense of urgency to get things done. but we're still young, so i don't even want a relationship with you, cuz we have a lot of time and can take things slow." okay, and that whole statement would have been okay with me and not hurt my feelings if she had said "i don't even want a relationship with you yet. But she didn't. :( i'm kinda hurt by that. but i'm just going with the flow. things will work out.

so stephy is making me dinner tomorrow, it's valentine's day. so i guess that's something special. i supppose it's not so good that i like steph as much as i do, since she is so commitment phobic, but being in a relationship is such a labeling thing. and i'm so anti-label right now. so i guess right now we're kinda already in a relationship, but it's a label-less relationship, so it can't be called a relationship. ug.. why do things in life have to be so complicated... and what would change if what we have now was all of the sudden called a relationship?? i can't imagine it being any different, just a different name. so i don't really see the big deal with it...

okay.. enough about that.

i am in the midst of baking for work tomorrow.. seeing that is valentine's day. (i think i've mentioned that already..) and i'm a nice person like that, and everyone deserves a little something on valentine's day... so i bring cookies. and brownies. i'm a regular Debby Crocker.

okay, i'm done ranting now. the ring, a relationship, and debby crocker. that's about it.

love,

Debbers

Posted by debbers at 9:55 PM EST

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Dog Sitting
Mood:  flirty
So my girlfriend and I are dog sitting for my mother's boyfriend. He has a small dog, named Kiely, she's really friendly and nice. A good dog, always goes to the door when she wants to go out. No problems. Well, no problems except for when you try to leave her alone. She sits by the door and whines, and whines, and whines. Did I mention she whines? So we are taking the dog in shifts. Stephy usually has the dog, unless she has to work, then I have the dog. It's working out so far. She was just gonna keep the dog the whole time, except she knows it would drive the other people in her apartment building nuts if she whinned the whole time she was at work. So she brings her here to me. Which is always a great excuse for Stephy to come and see me. :)

Things are going really well. Life is happy. I'm happy. Steph met my mom on Friday. I was all scared at first, but Mom just adores her. And that really means a lot to me. :) And Steph likes my mom. We all had a good time at dinner on Friday.

My mom went to Virginia this weekend. I guess my brother needed to go down there to get his stuff. So Mom, her boyfriend, my brother, and my oh so senile Aunt Barbara Ann all drove down to Virginia. Mom called me when she got there, she's really stressed out and was crying. (Which is nothing new cuz the women in my family cry at Jiffy Peanut Butter commercials.) So I tried to console her over the phone, which she said was helpful. But I really do feel bad that Mom is so stressed out about this. It just goes to prove that if more than 2 members of my family are in a confined space for more than half an hour, the fur starts to fly. I've seen it happen over and over again. We can't ever have a family function that goes off without a hitch, cuz someone's always gotta start something with someone else.

My hair is big and poofy.

Love,

Debby

P.S. The Guinea Pig is named Ethel.

Posted by debbers at 12:01 AM EST

Updated: Sunday, February 13, 2005 9:57 PM EST

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A name for my new pet.
Mood:  happy
Now Playing: American Pie.. the song, not the movie.
Okay, so today after work, because I am a sad lonely sap. I went to the pet store and bought myself a new friend. I got a guinea pig. A girl guinea pig. I've never owned a guinea pig before.. so it's a new pet to put on my list. But I have to come up with a name for her. So far I've only thought of two potential names, Ethel or Molly.

She's kinda squirmy right now, so the pics aren't the best, and they were taking with a web cam. but here's a couple pics of her....

And another....

and since i'm on a roll with the pictures right now. here's a pic of my getting all nice and cozy warm..

and my most recent "pretty" picture.

Alright, Ethel or Molly... or maybe something else. I'm so indecisive. :)

Love,

Debby

A break through.
Mood:  sad
Now Playing: some old Nirvana song.
So I had a breakdown tonight. Life is rough sometimes. But i guess when one area of your life improves another one starts to faulter.

I have a girlfriend now. I'm happy, hell, I'm not single. When was the last time I could say that??
I'm so happy.

I'm a bit torn now about my sexuality. For the longest time I considered myself bisexual. But now, I'm wondering if I'm really a lesbian? Kinda disturbing not knowing your own sexual preference. Would I be bi with strong gay more gay tendancies? or gay with slight bi tendancies? I don't like it when I'm unsure of things. Especially when those things are about me.
I'm so confused.

I'm becoming a bit of a recluse. Aside from my girlfriend, (who I see on the average of 3 times a week) and my co-workers while at work, I don't ever go out where other people are. This worries me, I used to be sociable. My momma is gone.
She has a new boyfriend, who seems like a nice enough guy. She's known him for about a week and a half, and every sense she left to go on her first date with him, she hasn't been home for more than a few minutes. I miss her. I know it's greedy and very bratty of me to feel this way. I want to spend time with her. I went from spending ever non-working minute with her, to not ever seeing her at all. or not talking to her. I really miss her. I was the biggest part of her life for like 4 months, and now she's got a boyfriend, and i'm just an afterthought. but i'm not just an afterthought. i'm her daughter, and she was the best friend i have up here, and now she's gone. :(
I'm so sad.

I'm so moody-swingy.

Debby

Mixed Emotions
Mood:  not sure
Okay, so my momma has this new boyfriend. which is great. but it means that she's never home. like never.. she's probably been home for like maybe the total for 2 hours in the past week and a half. but she's happy. so i'm happy for her. but i'm lonely. i don't like living alone. i don't do it too well.

so this entry is titled "mixed emotions" so here's my other emotion. i'm happy, so very happy. (and for anyone who knows me, yes i did just sing that. :) i have a girl friend. a real live girl friend. and she's so nice, and sweet, and smart, and she really likes me. and we haven't done it yet. which is amazing!! but i did spend the night with her over this past weekend. woohoo!! it's great. i really like her. it's cool. :) totally. :)

so that's about it. i'm sad about momma not being home ever now, but i'm happy cuz i have a girl friend. i guess when one area of your life starts to come together, another part starts to come apart. i'll deal with it.

love,
Debby

Oh, the pain, oh the agony!!
Mood:  accident prone
Okay, so I didn't go to the gym today. Seems that what I thought was a cold on Friday, is indeed a cold. Possibly even the flu. I'm all sore and achy, (which in part is from going to the gym) but i really feel like i've gotten run over by a city bus (or wish that i would be.)

so i went with my mom to her new boyfriend's house. (not the same boyfriend as last weekend, or the one from the week before that, but a new-new boyfriend. he seems okay. i like his dog. we had dinner over at his place. which isn't too far from where we live. at least this one doesn't live an hour away or more. good for mom for dating someone local this time.

i'm tired, and whinny and achey. i'm gonna take a hot shower, then hit the hay.

love,
debby

Back to the gym.
Mood:  bright
Okay, so I just got back from the gym again, two days in a row. not off to a bad start at all. and I'm eating better now. for breakfast, rice crispies with a banana and 2% milk. with no sugar! wow.. and then off to the gym for about an hour and a half. I'm learning how to use some of the equipment, lucky for me they all have sticker posters on them saying how to use them and what they work out.. my legs are a bit sore but I'm okay with that. no pain, no gain, right?? then I had a salad for lunch. I can do this. I'm cutting out the snacks. (for the most part. :)

umm, and that's all I've done today. I went to bed early last night, and woke up at 9 this morning. I've had a good day so far. :)

-- Debby

A membership to the gym.
Mood:  energetic
So, I played hookie from work today, I really needed a mental health day, a Debby day if you will. :)

So I went and got my paycheck, went out to lunch, then to the local gym, gold's gym, and got a membership. I took a tour of the gym yesterday and was really impressed by it. it looks like a really nice place to work out. and the staff was friendly, and the guy who gave me the tour.. hubba hubba! :)

so after paying for my membership, I went to the locker room to get changed into my sneakers and sports bra. it's been forever since I've worn either. I usually don't like sports bras because of the uni-boob effect it has on me, but it makes me a bit less bouncy, and the cleavage it supplies is a nice plus.

so I worked out for about an hour. 20 minutes on the tread mill, then 15 on the bike, followed with 5 on the stair master (oh my god, I thought I was going to die!) then another 15 on the treadmill.

then off to the locker room to get my stuff and leave. I think next time I go, I'll bring my work out clothes, and get changed there. cuz that way, I can get changed into my non-stinky clothes after I'm done working out.

I worked up a great sweat, and I feel a lot better about myself. I've finally taken the first step to a better life style. and I'm hooked into a one year contract. which really isn't that bad. so as long as I'm stuck paying for it, I might as well workout.

I want to live like I'm 25, not like I'm overweight, and I think I'm taking the right steps towards that goal. I resisted the temptation of homemade chocolate chip cookies for a snack after I got home from the gym, and I ate half an orange instead. and for lunch, instead of a burger, I had a salad. so far so good. I can do this. it's easy.

take care.

love, Debby

Damn the weather man!!!
Mood:  spacey
Topic: Ranting
Damn the weather man!! It's been snowing all day. I think it has finally let up.. but it's horrible.. all this crappy crappy snow all over everything. It's cold, and snowy. Damned winter anyways! And the weather man just said that there is a second snow storm only a day or two away. God I hate him!

I'm really snotty today... sneezing a lot. I'd like to think it's alergies, but I think it's a cold coming on. And damn it. I just got over the plague. At work, the department of health, everyone was sick the week before christmas. (Ironic... dept of health all sick??) But i bought this really cute box of tissues from Wal-mart today. It's leopard print. It's nice. Soft tissues. Easy on the nose. :)

Ummm, life is random. My birthday is coming up. The big 2-5. Oooooh..... It's a quarter of a century. Oh my God! I'm getting old. I'm gonna be 25 and what do i have to show for it?? Crap! That's it.. crap.. and 6 inches of snow on the ground.. go figure.

Okay, i'm done ranting. Life is normal. kinda boring. I learned how to play canasta. it's fun, and addicting. now if only i can convince real people to play with me, so i don't have to play online anymore.

take care!

love,

debbers